Afterlife
by KatastrophicTales
Summary: Cobra, executed for his crimes, finds himself making an unwilling deal with the devil. He has two options: Corrupt Lucy's soul and condemn her to an eternity as Satan's puppet, or spare her and forever be sentenced to the suffering and pain himself? There's no question about which he would rather, but darkening such an ignorantly bright soul may just prove more than he can handle.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1 - A Deal With The Devil**

Cobra stirs and groans, elongated ears twitching as they're filled with deafening screams. In all his twenty-six years of life he never wanted to rip off the damned things as much as he did right then. No matter how much he struggles to just block our the internal bellows, his magic refuses to obey him, and that in itself is alarming.

"What the fuck" He moans in pain and rolls to his side on the hard flooring. For a few painful moments he assumes he's laying on his cell floor, as always. Back in that nightmare-ish hell where the only thing he had to entertain himself was his occasional interactions with Lahar or the staff. But it doesn't take more than another minute of agonizing screeching for him to realize that cant possibly be the case. Hell, he shouldn't even be feeling anything right now. If memory serves him, he just had his head chopped clean off. Then again, he cant barely think straight right now. Its only been two fucking minutes and hes starting to question his sanity. This surely has to be some cruel and unusual punishment Lahar whipped up just for him. What is that bastard doing, executing the entire prisons population in the room over? No, if it was death that was causing those shrieks it would end along with their life. Torture maybe. Although that priss would be too worried about getting blood on his boots to even begin to stoop so low.

"Entertained are you?" A baritone voice chuckles sadistically. Entertained? Oh yes, he's in fucking heaven alright. Or rather, he would be, if it wasn't so damn loud. Its no secret that he thoroughly enjoys the suffering of others, but any criminal as sadistic can tell you its not nearly as satisfying when your not the one inflicting the pain. He would be over the fucking moon for this little internal show taking place just beyond his skull, but the aches in various parts of his body, especially his head, is putting quite the damper on his good time.

"Oh yea." He snorts sarcastically. His single eye opens to face the man, and hes instantly met with the blinding red glow of what he can only assume to be a lamp hanging above him. His whole Lahar theory is broken when he realizes all too quickly this is definitely not his cell. Last time he checked, his cell wasn't two hundred degrees with walls a century high. He blinks in surprise and leans up to take a look around. A pale peach room bathed in a red demonic glow with an alarming lack of doors. the only furniture is a simple stone desk, office chair, and a metric fuckton of paperwork, with absolutely no one in it. Great. Hes doomed to eternal paperwork. How does one even go about getting him in here?

"This is your room. You just... end up here. We don't need doors here" He laughs demonically. Who he is? Cobra doesn't have the slightest clue. His voice seems to radiate from everywhere, and the fact that he just answered his damned thoughts makes him very uncomfortable. He listens to other peoples souls, not the other way around.

"Oh let me guess, I'm in hell and I'm cursed to forever sit in this room because I'm an asshole?" He rolls his eyes, only half expecting that to be the case. He wasn't a religious man, never was. He didn't believe in a god or devil, heaven or hell, ect. He didn't waste his time praying to a higher being for fortune, he went out and took it for himself. He didn't put his faith in anyone but himself, and that went for any higher being that may or may not exist as well. Even now, as evidence of those higher beings is being set on his doorstep, he couldn't be bothered to give a fuck. Even if this is indeed hell, in all its pink wallpapered glory, why should he sit here and waste his thoughts on the god that had -albeit for good reason- rejected him? Cobra groans for the third time now and runs an aching hand back through his hair. This is ridiculous.

"Oh but your sarcastic accusations are correct! This is hell! And you are cursed to this room! Forever! Everyone is cursed to rooms! My most wicked punishment, rooms!" The mysterious voice quickly flips to a very peppy tone, even giving an malicious cackle at the end to add to the whole fucking insane factor. He's got to be kidding right? Theres no fucking way all the assholes of the world just get shoved into a room for eternity. Who has that many rooms? He definitely doesn't doubt he's the only one in this situation, though. Not with the soul shaking wails coming from everywhere. Granted, he was able to block them out a tone, but they still are definitely there. Their internal suffering is just enough for him to not question the legitimacy of what hes saying, knowing that there is no way unless in hell that such a insane amount of just overall displeasure to happen simultaneously.

"This is the waiting room." The voice says flatly after leaving the slayer a few moments to his thoughts. Cobra runs his hand over his face and falls to lay on his back. You know, hes starting to see why this is where people are sent to suffer. Its got fuckasses like this guy. What is he, a secretary?

"I am not! I, am Astaroth. You know, Satan? The devil? Mephistopheles? The personification of evil itself?! Ring a bell?" 'Satan' bellows, only adding to his oncoming migraine.

"Waiting room. Yea. Then why the fuck am I the only one here?" He directs his eye to the ceiling, as if 'Satan' is sitting just behind it, no doubt with a big ass megaphone in hand just to sound powerful. No, if he had to guess this 'Satan' character would be more like a hundred foot tall red skinned asshole standing above the worlds most complex dollhouse. The thought of the giant monstrosity playing dolls with all the jackasses of the world like a child elicits a small chuckle despite all his internal comfort.

"That is because this is the Mage waiting room. If I had everyone falling into the same waiting room it would just be a mess."

"So yea, waiting room? Waiting room for what? The largest human barbeque?" Even as Cobra sits on the heated stone floors, with an aching body and an oncoming headache that would no doubt bring him down to the same agony as everyone else in this damned place, he still takes it upon himself to be just as much of a snarky asshole as before.

"No. Though we do have the roasting chamber. Don't worry, with your background, I'm sure you will be paying it a visit very soon"

"Okay... So what exactly do you do with people then?"' He lets his curiosity get the better of him. Really, he wanted this devil guy to just throw him in the human oven and be done with it. He's gonna end up there anyway right?

"Oh I'm so glad you asked! You see, hell is a very complex system. Has to be when you house all the sinners of Earthland" With a echoed snap the room flips completely, sending the poor mans heart into his throat as he quickly falls to the ceiling. He closes his eye and braces for impact that never comes. Its several seconds of feeling weightless before he finally opens his eye. Its.. another room. Its much bigger, yea, but it has the exact same peach walls and hanging lamp. The only difference is the fifty or so people laying in their own blood with dead white eyes. most are on their back, completely ass naked, staring up to the ceiling. Cobra actually finds himself severly disturbed,

"I have a number of rooms like this. Its where all the boring people go. Mostly civilians. You can hear their thoughts cant you? So utterly uninteresting." The low voice whines not unlike a child would when its bored.

No, cobra cant hear them, how could he with the ridiculous amount? Maybe this room is just a small group but what about all the neighboring rooms? Does he even realize he can hear everything within at least a fifty meter radius? Dumbass. Another snap echoes and this time he doesn't close his eyes. He watches as his spun upside down and drops once again. Only this time he actually his the floor, and fuck does it hurt. He barely notices the fact he's back in the waiting room as he rolls to his back and clutches his shoulder, hissing in pain. Oh yea, just o and ragdoll his body around as much as you please satan, he definitely doesn't care. Its not like his a mortal human with flesh that can be torn and bruised and blood that can be spilled. Of course not.

"There are many other rooms in which people go, but that would take more time than I'm willing to spare on a mere human like you" Satan scoffs. Well its not like he wanted a tour a=on all his fucked up rooms.

Actually, that was exactly the case now that he thinks about it. He can only be left to wonder what could possibly be in the rest what freakish torture methods the devil himself as conducted. But that line of thought can wait, he does have an eternity after all.

"And which one of those damned torture chambers are you putting me into?" He says all too confidently. He'll be damned if he lets the aspect of sitting in one room for the rest of his life, subjected to various forms of suffering, get to him. He was imprisoned for practically most his life, he was fuckinf raised in the Tower of Heaven for fucks sake. He's already been through his whole life, this is just normal for him.

"Oh how I would love to break that resolve of your but.. I'm obligated to make you an offer"

"A deal with the devil? Cliché." He mutters, finally bringing himself to sit. His body definitely still hurt, it hurt even before the fall, but he was never one to let pain get to him.

"There is no deal, you are simply doing my bidding"

"And if I don't?"

"You will." Cobra arches an eyebrow at the all too quick response. He will huh?

"Just what is this 'deal' then?" His deep chuckle only piques his interest further.

"Oh I'm sure you will find it quite... interesting. Fun, even. Knowing the type of person you are, sadistic and-"

"Just answer the fucking question" Cobra cuts in before the being could go any further. He asked what the deal is, not for him to show off his extensive knowledge on his life (He still doesn't even know how he knows so much anyway, but he doubts hed get an answer out of that question. Definitely not a short one anyway).

"Alright alright. I'm assigning you to a human, one you may be somewhat familiar with if I'm correct? It will be your job to haunt, terrorize, and corrupt this given human by whatever means necessary."

Cobra hums in thought, considering the offer. Someone he's familiar with? Theres not many people he knows that he wouldn't be willing to terrorize. Theres also not many people he knows that aren't already corrupted. Not to mention he isn't going to just jump at the chance to fuck with someone just because he's an asshole. He's passed the point of goin out of his way to ruin some guys day a long time ago. If someone stands in his way, he wont hesitate, that much is true, but why waste his time 'corrupting' someone? And for what reason? Really, when he thinks about it, it doesn't seems like this would be something he's be willing to do at all. Not to mention hes not even getting anything out of it.

"Oh no no no, you misunderstood. You have no choice. I need a secretary that will comply to my wishes and it is your job to take the woman I chose to be suitable and turn her to, as I like to call it, 'the dark side'. You do not have a choice"

"Oh but I do. You can threaten me but you cant force me" Cobra chuckles, comfortable with having the upper hand in the matter. If Satan here can just force his every move and make him, its no different than Satan just doing it himself. In that case, who's really the winner?

"Your sounding like a child Erik."

"A child that has the upper hand" He crosses his arms, knowingly letting himself look like part of the child too.

"I was going to tell you some other important things but since you want to be a prick about it, bye bye Erik my friend"

He was certain that when he heard that snap once again he'd be put in some torture chamber and left to rot until he sunk into insanity or changed his mind. So when a clear blue sky engulfed his vision he was a little confused to say the least. It isn't until he turns himself around does he see earthland, and just how fast its getting larger. He struggles to breath as his head floods with panic. As intelligent and quick on his feet as he is, his brain completely shuts down just then. He can only stare in horror as he plummets, praying to whatever higher being may or may not exist that this is some joke.

Judging by the pain that erupts through his body as he collides face first with a river, it most certainly is not a joke.

The last thing he can remember is the side of his body slamming the bottom of said river, and darkness filling his vision.

You know, that human barbeque doesn't sound so bad right about now.

* * *

 **A/N: Ah this seems way too short but I had to start this off somehow huh? Anyways, I had this idea one night from rewatching Welcome To Hell by Erica Wester on YouTube. So credits go to that for the idea. I'd like to say right now that I have no idea where the hell I'm taking this and I'm not very experienced in regards to writing I just thought this kinda thing would be interesting. ((Also sorry for any grammatical/spelling/ect errors this is kinda just a way to pass the time when I'm bored so I'm not going to be pressuring myself to go back and fix issues until perhaps when its finished, sorry))**

 **Thanks for reading 3**


	2. Chapter 2

The sun is just barely reaching its peak in the sky when a large burst of water breaks Lucy's focus from her notebook. She had the day to herself for once, so she thought she ought to make use of the spare time and start drafting out the next chapters of her book. Fate, however, seems to have different plans for her, if the waterworks just outside her window say anything. The obnoxiously large splash snaps her head to her window just in time to see the water droplets fall from the sky like a small moments rain. Somehow, she suspects this is the work of a very bored Natsu. Oh she can just picture it, Natsu asking Happy to fly him high in the sky, just to drop him to the water below. And for what? Surely he wouldn't attempt the worlds largest cannon ball right outside her apartment for a reason that doesn't involve her.

"Stupid flame brain..." She grumbles out loud to herself. "Oh but that river isn't that deep..." Her voice quickly turns from annoyed to concerned when the realization crosses her mind. With a huff, she sets down her notebook and turns to kneel just at her window. No signs of his little blue partner in crime anywhere, as far as she can tell. The waters too murky to see beneath the surface from here, but she certainly doesn't see his little pink head emerging anywhere. That idiot!

Before she can even blink shes slipping on a pair of boots and hurrying down to the sidewalk below, in all her fuzzy pajama pants and tank top glory. She quickly jogs to the edge and leans over it, eyes flicking here and there in search of a body. Seriously, that stupid cat would be pretty damned useful right about now. Shes about to just start calling the things name, ignoring the fact that this might not be Natsu at all, but the blurry figure just beneath the current catches her attention before she can open her mouth. She can feel her heart sink at the sight of the motionless form. She swallows thickly and frantically searches around for someone, anyone, but no one happens to be walking by. She groans and climbs up to perch on the elevated stone slab, mentally bracing herself.

She could have sat there for hours and she still wouldn't have been prepared for the disgustingly wet feeling of the thick fuzz of her pants alone.

The blonde is about as graceful as a bird in a hurricane as she feels blindly beneath the waters surface. By the time her hands find his arm shes already desperate for air, and he sure as hell is not coming up easily. She pushes herself off the rocky bottom of the canal and tugs him along up with her. Lucy's lungs gasp in the much needed air, her thin arms holding on the him for dear life. Her eyes open to long strands of soaked blond hair in her vision, but even with the obscured sight she easily notices the lack of pink hair. In its place are short maroon locks. She almost looses her grip in surprise. What the fuck was some guy doing falling from the sky, into the canal just outside her house no damned less? And _how the fuck_ is his hair not wet? Lucy struggles to tug the seemingly lifeless body down the stream to the small staircase leading back up to land. Wait, he isnt breathing.

'Oh my Mavis okay dont panic CPR, give him CPR. Ohhh i dont know how to give CPR! I just breath into his mouth yea?" Lucy mentally panics all the while dragging him onto the bottom stair. She quickly moves her hair back as she moves over him, her heart refusing to beat for just a moment. She can practically feel the pounding of the poor organ in her ears as her chocolate eyes scan over the scarred face.

Cobra...

Her organs seem to jump in surprise right along with her as she scrambles up to a shaky stand. He's supposed to be in prison for no doubt many more years to come, what would he be doing out in Magnolia? She swallows thickly and crouches down beside him, trembling all the while for reasons she cant begin to put into words. This is the same man that had tried to sacrifice her to a damned clock. But, he was also the man who helped them out during the dragons attack and willing turned himself back in to continue his punishment, if memory serves her. Now, he's laying just outside her house with a alarming lack of vital signs. She checks his neck, wrist, and even goes as far as to place a hand over his chest, she cant feel any signs of a heartbeat.

'Virgo! Please, is there anything you can do?' Lucy clamps her eyes shut and tries to mentally connect to the spirit.

"Princess, is everything alright? You feel panicked." The every loyal maid comes puffing to life just beside her.

"I-i think he's dead.. He was dropped in the river and he's just not breathing. I know he's done a lot of terrible things but would you please go get Wendy? I'd never forgive myself if..." She lets her words trail off, not wanting to even finish the sentence. She falls to a kneel beside him, picking up his wrist and feeling for a pulse. It was wishful thinking, but she was hoping maybe his heart just decided to beat again.

"Virgo!" Lucy shouts when the maid steps _into_ him. She can only stare in shock where her feet fell through, mouth ajar.

"I-I'm afraid I'm lost here princess.." The under dressed girl scans out into the river, as if hes... not even here. An invisibility spell? No, she can see him. This doesn't make sense and every moment wasted widdles down his chance at life. But if this happens to be some sick illusion.. Yea, that seems a lot more likely. That would explain why he isn't wet.

"Virgo.. Can you look around? See if there's anyone suspicious around? Dont forget the sky too" Despite the fear hammering at her heart, telling her he's really here and dead, she's forced to consider all other options. Virgo gives an obedient, albeit confused, nod and takes off don under the already crumbling stone, the hole she drills only adds to the pile of hazards. She sighs and drops Cobra's hand.

He looks so much like him, not that she is very familiar with his features. She cant help but let her hand gingerly brush away the fringe of hair laying across his single eye. You know, he doesn't look like such an asshole when his face is all lax like this. Lucy shakes her head to be rid of any creepy or perverted thoughts before they can manifest. In all honesty, she believes Cobra isn't that bad. He was just doing as he was told, he was always working under someone or another. She refuses to believe he is the sadistic cold blooded criminal he was imprisoned of being.

"No suspicious figures i can spot, princess" Lucy isnt sure when her spirit had returned, and how she covered the area that fast, but suddenly shes behind her once again.

"Thank you Virgo. I.. Um, you can go." Lucy lets her mind linger a little more than necessary on the whole dead Cobra topic. Half of her wants to drag him up to her apartment and see if he happens to disappear at some point, or wakes up. The other half wants to be nowhere near him, in fear of the latter option.

She sits there next to him on the cracked stone for a short while, staring blindly off at the limp body. She lets her hand gently touch his forearm. You know, she never seen magic like this. She can touch him, feel the chill of his body compared to her own. She doesnt stop herself from picking up his wrist again and just examining it.

Just then, his ring finger twitches, making her throw her hands back and squeak as if in a moments notices his going to sit up from the dead and slaughter her. She scurries to a stand, stepping back a few inches too far and toppling back into the river below. She was just getting dry too! The flustered blonde flaps blindly and hacks out the water that washed up her nostrils in the fall.

"Stupid one eyed asshole!" She curses the whole drag back up onto land. He isnt even physically here and he's still fucking up her day. Really, she probably just was seeing things. She probably didnt even see his fingers move at all! Oh but what if they did though?

She runs her hands back through her now soaking wet hair and stomps up the stairs.

'Screw it! I need a hot bath..'

* * *

'Stupid Mavis damned snake fucker and his 12 million layers of clothes. I bet thats why he weighs so much. Or he has several snakes wrapped around his body beyond that ridiculous turtleneck of his.' The all too vivid thoughts is what drives Cobra out of his very unpleasant sleep. He stirs, only to have his back dropped down against a rough feminine scream That erupts soon after certainly doesnt help the ever present headache throbbing at his skull. If memory serves, he was just falling from the sky into some body of water. Now he's waking up to some girl screaming and complaining about his weight?

'Oh my fucking gosh he's actually moving, i know i said i hoped he wasnt dead but come on i have a live and moving killer in my fucking kitchen!' The panicked scrambling about his almost entertaining, but the fact he's pretty much at the Satan's mercy is kinda a mood killer.

His eye cracks open to reveal a not so interesting ceiling. Its not blood red and searing into his eyes, so he's say this is a step above hell already.

"D-dont move, im not afraid to hurt you." His eyes lower to his side to see a very familiar blond backed against a counter, frying pan in hand as if its the most menacing thing. For fucks sake, they're in a kitchen, grab a damned knife.

"Yes you are" He snorts in a matter-of-fact tone. There's something familiar about her, and he cant quite place it yet. It isn't until she takes several hesitant steps towards him does he notice the pink fairy tail mark on her hand. Not-so-found memories of the infinity clock spark up, leaving a bad taste in his mouth. Shit like this makes him realize just why he was executed.

"I saved your life, you could at least show a little kindness!" Saved his life? He doesn't have a life anymore to save. Even so, it doesn't matter if she dragged his ass out the depths of hell herself and made Satan resurrect him, he still wouldn't bother with any form of courtesy.

"Oh? Let me guess, you pulled me out of the water? How heroic." He mutters sarcastically. He has to admit, hes a little disappointed that she didn't show any fear when he sits up, but then he remembers the stupidity that literally is the fairy tail guild. Knowing that band of overly peppy asshats, she probably believes that if need be she can just slay him with a wave of her key and the power of friendship.

'What a dick..'

"Okay fine, if your gonna be rude about it you can just leave" She huffs. Oh he would fucking love to. If this is who Satan wants him to deal with he's quicker hang himself. Blondie here sees a criminal falling from the sky and her first thought is 'i better save this asshole'? Not only that, she dragged him up into her house. Really, she's just asking to just killed at this point.

"Ever occur to you that i might just kill you?" He has to know. Truth be told its been so long since he had the opportunity to mess with someone, though something tells him that blondie here and her pack of fairies isn't going to give him much in the way of entertainment.

"Yes. But you dont seem like the type to kill without reason. That would just be stupid" Does she even hear herself? He's killed hundreds just for the simple fact that he felt like it, what makes her any different? He would kill her just for interfering in his plans, better yet, for calling him a snake fucker.

"Thats a fuckin joke. I got plenty of reason with the amount of times you shitheads got in my way." he pushes himself to a stand and lunges at her. Only, his magic refuses to obey him and her frying pan is quicker than his hand. He growls when it makes contact with the side of his head and stumbles back. He can hear the frantic pounding of her heart as she takes several steps back. Yet she remains in a fighting stance with that hunk of metal slung over her shoulder like a bat.

"Why dont you just use your magic then, if you wanted to kill me you probably could have done it from the floor!" He has to admit, she's got flare. As idiotic as it may be, shes still standing there prepared for a fight despite her mind telling her to run.

He looks down at his hand, willing his magic to appear yet it doesnt. Fucking fantastic. Why can he still hear her if he's not even allowed to use his poison.

'If only you weren't a stubborn child, you would know your forbidden to use you magic with ill intent' As the deep voice fills his head he cant help be roll his eyes.

"Oh shut the fuck up" He groans out loud, barely righting himself after that blow. As if his head hasn't suffered enough..

"Excuse me?" She scoffs, clearly not hearing the asshole.

"Oh its just your lucky day, i cant fucking hurt you." He takes a step to walk past her only to have her shove the pan against his chest to back him up.

"What do you mean you cant hurt me?" She steps in front of him before he can just walk around her. As if his day didnt start off bad enough, now he's being pressed for information by a damp blonde in fuzzy panda pants. Oh how far he has fallen. He just wants to leave this damned town before he's subjected to any more bullshit.

'Hm. I should mention your prohibited to stay within a certain distance of her. You doubt my capabilities.'

This is bullshit! Why him? Why not some other sick fuck? He's sure theres a long line of sadistic assholes just like him who'd be more than willing to be leashed to a busy blonde, surely this devil could find someone else easily. Cruel and unusual doesnt even begin to describe this punishment.

"Nothing. Hey, how does genocide sound? Ever wanted to kill anyone? Its easy, you should try it sometime. Preferably soon." He couldn't give less of a shit about the deep melodic chuckle that fills his head, he wants to be done with this. If catering to Satan doesn't warrant any of his fucks, the petrified stare the blonde gives him sure doesnt either.

"Um, no! Your sick if you think i'd ever do something like that.." He rolls his eye at her offended tone. Well, he cant say he didn't try. She's never going to fall off her goody two shoes pedestal so there's no point in even trying right?

'Seems like your in for quite the challenge, Erik'

Rather than staying with the blonde, which is already proving to be irritating with the sheer amount of questions buzzing around her mind, he decides to test the distance he can walk from her.

"Hey, wait you havent even told me what you were doing falling from the fricken sky" She gestures absurdly at the ceiling.

"Can you just stand still for two minutes?" His harsh tone earns him several vulgar mental objections from her, but she stops right there in the kitchen door. "Okay? Why?" Again with all the questions.

'Maybe being cooped in that cell for years drove him insane..'

"Just stand there" He groans and quickly finds his way to her front door.

"Hey! Where-"

"Stay" He commands one last time, genuinely surprised when she actually listens. As far as he can tell her fear of him left when he told her he couldnt hurt her. She cant honestly be that gullible can she? Actually, he doesnt doubt that. The real question is, being so disgustingly trusting, how the fuck is she still alive.

He ponders the question longer than he should as he walks down the pavement. He actually makes it off her street entirely before slamming into an invisible wall. Pushing against it, punching it, it does nothing. He doesnt know the exact measure, and the devil doesn't bother to tell him apparently, but its a good enough distance to be able to keep away from her. This magical barrier starts to move back towards him, probably from her moving. He cant help but wonder what would happen if, say, he got smashed between it and an actual wall. If he's lucky, the answer is death.

He finally begins his walk back after a minute or two.

'Fucking asshole!' Is the first thing he hears of her when he gets close enough.

'Virg- Oh great. What do i even say? Oh hey yea i just saved a major criminal and took him into my house but whoops i kinda lost him so the whole town just might be in danger?' Her thoughts are the only thing he has to entertain himself, since anyone else half as interesting doesn't seem to be close enough to hear. He wouldn't admit it but her soul is much more lively and entertaining than most peoples. If anything, thats the only plus to having to be near her of all people. Coming to think of it, he cant even remember her name. Something with an L. Lizzy? Laina?

Why does he even care?

He takes the easy way in and climbs up to her windowsill. True to her nature, her window was left wide open. She's just asking to get killed or raped huh? Maybe thats why she leaves the thing open, she has a thing for being taken against her will. Or maybe the little blonde thinks she can actually handle herself should an intruder attack her. He chuckles to himself and hops inside. He cant decide which is funnier.

It had actually slipped his mind that she was a celestial mage, so when he comes back in to see a man in large cat ears crossing his arms in front of her, for a moment he's actually surprised.

"Really really its nothing" She laughs nervously and waves a hand to dismiss whatever topic he had previously brought up. He can only wonder if he's visible to others as he slowly steps into the kitchen. Those creepy ass cat ears twitch in his direction, denying Cobra's assumption of them being fake.

"Im starting to think you haven't been getting enough sleep, princess" The lions head turns in his direction and his eyes survey the area. He isnt one to be frozen in fear but he damn well doesnt make a move until the glorified kittens turns his head back to his master

Wait.. Did he just call her princess?

"Haha! Yea that must be it! Im just... So tired. I should take a nap" Her yawn couldnt be more obviously forced, but the cat seems to buy it enough to bid her a farewell- along with a very sudden kiss to the back of her hand -and puff back to wherever the fuck she stores those things.

"What are you doing!" She hisses no sooner than he leaves, revealing the frying pan she had hidden behind her back.

"What, didnt i say id be back?" He thoroughly enjoys the way he seems to easily upset her. No if he only had a way of forcing fear into the mix he might actually have some fun here.

"Yea but why? Why cant you hurt me? Why were you falling from the mavis darned sky, and WHY are you HERE? I mean, for someone who was supposed to be in jail hundreds of miles away, YOU SURE AS HELL AINT" She wails with a very pathetic throw of the frying pan. His unamused eye rolls. Usually when a normal person drags a cold blooded criminal out of the river and up into their apartment- No, nevermind. normal people just dont drag criminals into their kitchen. But if they did, their first course of action probably wouldnt be to swing around a frying pan like its excalibur and scream bloody mary for answers.

Then again, Fairy Tail is eons away from normal.

"I have my reasons"

"And they are...?" Her doe brown eyes glare expectantly.

"Not your business" Needless to say that ticks her off. He isnt sure if he should back up or try and defend himself when she inches herself towards him. The fact he actually considers the running option seriously concerns him.

"Is it so hard to just explain?" Her voice is eerily calm, differing greatly from her soul.

"No, just dont want to

"Your a prick"

"Thanks for noticing"

"Can you at least tell me why you cant hurt me? If the magic council gave you any kind of-"

"No"

"Wait was that no to the first question or the magic council thing?"

"Shouldnt ask two questions at once blondie"

One minute, he's watching the fire in her eyes and the burning rage in her soul, the next hes taking a cutting board to the side of the head. Somewhere in that jumble of emotions and lines of thought, he heard that one coming. Truth is, he's just to mentally exhausted to do anything but let the blow send him stumbling to the floor. If the impact of the wood didn't already send him on the way to unconscious ave, the contact with the floor sure sent him under.

* * *

 **A/N: Yea I didnt put everything i wanted to in this chapter ive been lazy. But to be fair the new episodes of Sherlock were put on nexflix, so obviously i just had to rewatch the entire show along with them.**

 **Anyways, second chapter. I feel like Lucy is a little OOC? If you notice any of the characters going ooc it'd be nice if you left a review on it and how you think they should be ((I like hearing others thoughts on how a character should act in a given situation)) Next chapter should be a bit more interesting hopefully TvT**

 **Thanks for reading ! 3**


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